Top.Mail.Ru
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2014

BrainStream

...a Stream of consciousness from the Brain of B.K. DeLong

[Poll/HowTo] Looking for a job/Know about a job? Hate your job? Know someone who does? Let me help!
2014
bkdelong
I've already posted about this once to friends-only but I promised to do a public post on utilizing me as a means for helping you find a new job.

That being said, feel free to pass this around but do note that family and immediate friends will have to take first priority. I will do my best with everyone I can who has needs - I want to help as it is my nature.

So - the key to this? LinkedIn.
So what about this LinkedIn and getting me a job?Collapse )
I think that covers everything. Go ahead, fill out the poll, and do feel free to spread the post around. Provided I don't get absolutely overwhelmed with responses, I will do what I can to help - just remember if you're serious, I do get distracted and can lose focus. Not staying in touch with me will make me think my services are not truly needed.

I will note a lot of this information is confidential and personal. That is why I set it up so only I can see the responses. I will understand if you choose not to fill those parts out. Feel free to email me off-journal via bkdelong@pobox.com with a subject of "bkdelong LiveJournal Job Survey details" if you'd like to include that information.

In my day job, we have a non-signature binding statement of confidentiality that everyone in the community subscribes to. I hold that same confidentiality to any information shared here unless I ask and receive your permission to share said information.

The Job PollCollapse )

Love Hard, Love True, Love Always - On Different Kinds of Love for the Different People in our Life
oct2011
bkdelong
Love Hard, Love True, Love Always
by Ben DeLong on Thursday, February 14, 2013 at 12:17pm

I am one of those people who struggles a bit on Valentine's Day - astrologically I am a Taurus and Libra Rising with both signs rules by Venus, planet of Love and Relationships. Don't forget that last word. I am the stereotypical romantic, sentimentalist: I remember songs, tastes, smells and most certainly emotions from moments in time. I strive to choose gifts from the heart that I know will have great meaning to the recipient, regardless of my relationship to them and it took a while before I learned that I needed to give with love unconditionally so that I would not be heartbroken when I would not get love back.

I read a great article about the 5 types of affection - verbal expressions, quality time, gifts, service, and touch. Any relationship needs a good, truthful balance of some or all of these to sustain itself. But it doesn't have to be equal and it don't have to include all of them - every person has different needs and expectations within a relationship and communications regarding those needs are absolutely key to make sure one partner is not spinning their wheels on one form of affection the other is not fulfilled by. You may prefer gifts and quality time but your SO is really content with verbal expressions, service and touch. This is so key

But when I speak of relationships and love - I'm not just talking about romantic partners and lovers either. Today is Valentine's Day - a Hallmark holiday to be sure - so should every day be a balanced expression of your love for those near and dear to you (with the occasional surprises of more than expected to keep things fresh). This includes your friends (especially close ones), extended family, including your kids and significant others. But the one we so often forget most is ourselves.

Yes, expressions of self-love often seem ridiculous, cliche, hard to comprehend and come across as selfish. They may seem cheesy or one wonders where to even start with "loving yourself" when sometimes you have a hard time wondering how others do. Been there - a lot over my life. But then this thought occurred to me:

I'm a big fan of movies- RomComs and good Buddy-Comedies are my favorite, occasionally I'll go for a Drama if it includes a mix of the aforementioned. Big surprise, eh? Those of you who like either of those movies - think about your favorites and the relationships in those movies you love or identify with or wish you had (or do have) with a best friend, sibling, child, parent, or romantic/passionate lover.

Now template that love you see, onto yourself - you know what you want - whether you heard it in a song, read it in a book/graphic novel or saw it in a movie. Be your own best friend, loving parent to your inner child, best brother to your inner sister (nurturing animus/anima) or vice-versa, or romantic/passionate lover. Who knows what you truly want for yourself and (yes, I'm going to go out on a not so unrealistic limb and say) definitely deserve better than you?

Every so often, remind yourself of what you want in life, listen to your favorite songs, watch a few favorite movies, read a few good books and then take yourself out on the best date no ones ever managed to get right or that getaway weekend you've dreamed of going on and live life like you want to live it - because when everyone sees you so happy living, you might catch the eye of those you've been seeking for so long who want to join you for the ride.

And don't forget, somebody out there ALWAYS loves you - ALWAYS. You may not realize it, you may not think so but someone is always holding space in their heart for that person across the room who looks a little sad at a party or work, or the friend going through a rough time that they don't know quite how to help, or their sibling they've lost touch with and haven't found the time to reconnect with, they family they don't see enough, their child whom they will always love unconditionally, and the hard, solid love of friends for life - unseen by many as they go through life and forgotten by the stresses that often overwhelm us all.

You are all loved every day of the year by someone - don't forget to love yourselves too and if any of this rings true, be sure to send some love out to the others in your life who you care deeply for.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Raising funds & walking for domestic violence/abuse prevention & awareness - this Sunday, 5/6/12
bearhug
bkdelong

It's the last few days to help me raise funds for the "Walk for HAWC" (Healing Abuse Working for Change - a MA-based organization) for domestic violence awareness this Sunday.



Thanks to all who have donated so far - I'm about one-quarter towards my goal though our team has raised quite a bit overall.



I myself have friends and acquaintances who have been the victims of domestic or intimate violence (being inclusive of people in long-term relationships, engaged or even dating). If you know someone who has ever experience abuse or bullying, or if you would like to support me in reaching my goal, every donation (big or small) makes a difference!



Please give what you can or do share and spread the word if you cannot or already have. Thank you for helping us create a safer community.


20th WALK for HAWC - Helping raise awareness about domestic abuse
2014
bkdelong
I have decided to participate in this year's WALK for HAWC - their 20th on May 6th, 2012 - and am hoping to raise $500 for my team. HAWC used to be known as "Help for Abused Women and Children", now "Healing Abuse Working for Change", and I've known too many friends, relatives and acquaintances who have suffered from domestic/intimate violence at all levels - Emotional, Physical, Verbal and even Economic. This year I walk in their honor and memories to raise awareness and funds for the work HAWC does as well as a more general awareness overall.

If you can give - as little as $5 to as much as $100 would be wonderful. Either way, I rely on my friends, family and acquaintances to spread the word for me when I participate in such efforts so - truly - thanks very much in advance for anything you can do.

Let me know if you have any questions.

[BOS] On the alleged Norovirus outbreak
2014
bkdelong
So there appears to be an outbreak of Norovirus going around - from at least two parties in the Boston area this past weekend. Given there's another large one this weekend, I wanted to post this. I wish you the best and hope those of you ill heal well. If you have read about someone on your Friends List who has a confirmed diagnosis and got ill yourself, please read the CDC FAQ and educate yourself:


  • This is a foodborn illness.

  • People with norovirus are contagious from the moment they begin feeling ill to at least 3 days [past when symptoms subside]

  • Norovirus can spread rapidly in closed environments like daycare centers [and indoor parties].

  • Contamination vectors include: Eating food or drinking liquids that have been contaminated, touching contaminated surfaces or objects then touching your mouth, and having direct contact with an infected person through caring for, sharing utensils, food or drink with them.

  • Prevention: Wash hands with soap and water while potentially supplementing (not replacing) with a hand sanitizer that contains at least 62% ethanol solution, washing all fruits & vegatables and not letting anyone who shows symptoms prepare food for others until at least 3 days after better, clean all household surfaces with bleach-based cleaner or one made with 5-25 tablespoons of household bleach per 1gal of water and immediately launder any clothes that could have infected biological material on them at the maximum length washer cycle with detergent while machine-drying them.

If you have gotten a diagnosis or were confirmed at the same location as someone who was and got ill yourself, perhaps submit an anonymous report to HealthMap (a joint project by Harvard, BU, MIT and other researchers funded in part by Google) and PLEASE encourage others to do the same.

They also have an iPhone and Android app. Be sure to state in your note whether you had a CONFIRMED diagnosis by a doctor or whether you got sick with a gastro-intestinal "bug" and were at a party with someone who received a confirmed diagnosis. We don't want to skew the statistics here with the telephone game.

This is apparently spreading around Eastern MA but I'm not seeing the vectors. If someone at work, or you know someone with a child who may have been ill..it might be worth mentioning to those folks what's going on.

Take the above-mentioned precautions, be sure you've recovered for at least 3 days prior to attending any public events, and most of all - get better, feel better and be well.

For those of you attending parties, simply follow the precautions and you should be fine.

The Last Valentinr
love
bkdelong
I am a hapless romantic - as I am known to channel many different aspects of personality, there is a chivalrous part of me that cares about letting each person know in my life how I feel about them on a semi-regular basis.

I'm not the best at it and I tried to make up for it publicly in the annual Confessionals thread that goes around Livejournal.

Let me know if you are doing Valentinr by posting your 100x100 widget in the comments and I would be happy to respond, or send one to me and in the 6hrs or so left, I will do my best to respond in kind.

My Valentinr - bkdelong
Get your own valentinr

Writer's Block: Hit the road, Cupid (Day of Listening & Filling a Role)
2014
bkdelong
If you had the power, would you permanently eliminate Valentine's Day?


Yes, I think I would eliminate the concept of Valentine's Day if only I could supplant it with the concept that a single, commercialized holiday should not be the only day out of the year to let your best friends, family and lovers know how extra-special you feel about them. They should know this through regular communication and unexpected surprises throughout the year - even if you pick some other random day or two annually to do something out-of-the-ordinary that shows forward-thinking, careful thought, sentimentality, and how much you care.

All Valentine's Day does (besides boost the revenues of the candy, greeting card, and floral industries) is not only set unrealistic expectations for relationships but it also often brings them out into the light if one partner does not get what they were expecting. It also takes those not in a relationship and perpetuates a set of ideals that aren't necessarily healthy when looking for a sustainable long-term relationship.

Being an emotionally-intuitive person who relies heavily on observation of interaction, semantics, body-language, facial-expression and action you can truly learn a lot by watching what is being said vs what someone's facial expression and body language is saying as well as what they end up doing. You learn a lot about what someone really wants verses what they claim is acceptable.

(Unfortunately, this doesn't always work for me personally as part of the challenge with having strong empathy is it clouds logic and reason so when it comes to something personal, I lose my own abilities to parse...working on that.)

That being said, I've always made an effort when a friend is lonely, depressed, having relationship challenges, struggles seeking someone out or just wants to vent a bit - to be there to listen, to hold space, to siphon off the burden of negative energy that is consuming a bit of their soul and their being so they can feel a little more weightless and a little more functional.

I think when not engaged in my own activities, Valentine's Day seems as good a day as any to make an extra effort - if you want to chat, message me on Livejournal/Facebook, the myriad of IM services listed in my profile, email or SMS via my cell. Let me know if you'd like to talk voice - that's limited during day hours and somewhat in the evening.

I don't have any special training I'm not a psychologist or have any experience as a mediator. I don't claim to be better than anyone else at anything but I seem to have a bit of a knack for fostering a safe environment for allowing people to open up and purge a bit of what's eating them up. If I can do that, why not.

Happy Valentine's Day - let's change the meaning of this sterile, day of consumerism and get a little healthy healing on.

Writer's Block: I'm in love with my car
2014
bkdelong
If you could have any car in the world, what would it be?


I'd say the Moller Skycar because then I'd no longer have to say the cliche'd "Where's my flying car?". He's been working on models for years and all have seemed fairly functional - waiting for an X-Prize to beat him out.

In reality, I'd like to have one of the new prototype cars coming out this or next year making use of GPS + Speed for Vehicle to Vehicle communication (V2V) to help people stop faster when there's an accident or problem car two to three cars ahead you can't see until too late.

I know the car industry hope to make such a feature standard and build in privacy controls much like the wireless device industry has WRT being able to locate and identify/find you.

While Joyful Springtime Lasteth - Valentinr [Meme]
love
bkdelong
I did this last year and I'll do it again. This year I'm doing more preemptive reciprocity and giving friends and those dear to me their own Valentinr notes where I see them.

So however you feel, even if it's just an elementary school Batman & Robin "I'm glad you're my partner in crimefighting", (yes, yes...oh the double-entendres), feel free to pass one my way and I will do the same if I see it.

Egotistical? Attention-seeking? Perhaps. But in soliciting I also find out if you have one as well and I like giving back more than I receive.

So an early Happy Valentine's Day to you:

My Valentinr - bkdelong
Get your own valentinr

Tell it to me flat out (screened meme)
2014
bkdelong
As seen on the LJs of several acquaintances:

regyt asks: "Why the world doesn't have a meme where everyone leaves screened comments with what they want to say to to the poster but haven't yet for whatever reason -- and I say, indeed, why not? So! Tell me anything you want me to know - about me, about you, about your mom, whatever you like."

I'm allowing anonymous comments and everything is screened. Tell me something you want to tell me, anonymously or not. If you say you want me to unscreen, I will, provided it's in my comfort-zone.

(With the screening turned on, I can't reply without unscreening said message so may replay Out of Band via email, FB or something else.)

[Review] "Bohemian Bacchanalia" from the Boston Circus Guild - Awesome!!
2014
bkdelong
An awesome, awesome show.

Handsome Chuck put together an amazing performance at Oberon with the Boston Circus Guild last night through the "Bohemian Bacchanalia".

With no words and quiet aplomb, he sax-blasted his way throughout the audience and on tables all night, keeping the ever-lively and stomping Emperor Norton's Stationary Marching Band (ENSMB) rocking their fans throughout the night. Johnny Blazes as MC wryly kept things moving from act to act with salacious naughtiness donning both sultry and Bleach-esque outfits - yes, Steampunk + glitter works! It IS the metal!

All of the acts were really a feast for the eyes. T'was truly difficult to pick which I liked best- I think the 3 aerialist performances were most breathtaking but "A Different Spin" really was a lot of fun. The second routine by "Rogue Burlesque" using Oingo Boingo's "Weird Science" brought me back to the 80s in a bemused way and the Vadalna Tribal Dance Company's second act (I missed the first) was mesmerizing.

Then again, anyone who saw me might have noticed I was a little...into the music and dancing quite a lot. I have this...body/music intuition and once I feel it I get a bit hypnotized.My mind tries to pick out all the trace strands of melody, harmony and percussion from each of the instruments, moving the entirety of my body to all of it in synchronicity and it is a challenge to break me from the trance. Once I managed to procure a bottle of water, it was well-used (though rationed).

All in all a great and absolutely wonderful time. I can't wait for the next show - if you missed it, are local and any of the above sounds intriguing or interesting, for $15 you should truly be asking yourselves why you missed it and be sure to be at the next one.

All these groups have Facebook Pages so just "Like" them and you'll receive occasional event invites (if you want) to be alerted and some of them have email lists as well.

MBTI and Enneagram update: ENFJ
2014
bkdelong
Guess I don't rely quite on iNtuition as I thought. ;)

But then it's all subjective until we're in-the-moment. Going to retake a few other versions of the tests and see what comes up.

ENFJ - "Persuader". Outstanding leader of groups. Can be aggressive at helping others to be the best that they can be. 2.5% of total population.
Take Free Jung Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com





Enneagram Test Results
Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||||||| 66%
Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||||||| 80%
Type 3 Image Awareness |||||||||||||||| 63%
Type 4 Sensitivity |||||||||||| 43%
Type 5 Detachment |||||| 23%
Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||||||||| 73%
Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||| 46%
Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||| 46%
Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||| 46%
Your main type is 2
Your variant is social
Take Free Enneagram Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

What Dreams May Come
techno deity
bkdelong
Just had an incredibly vivid dream on the coming together of two family traditions - one taught to a child through blood by their Granny (Aching to know who it was but she had a vibe) & the other tradition taught by the family "help" who appeared to be decended from Africa or some sort of non-white, African aboriginal-blooded slaves (e.g. whether the SLAVES came from Haiti or Jamaica, their decendants were of Africa).


At the end, Granny wanted to learn the ways of "Fred" and what I gathered were his wife and mother. I remember there was a spitting on her left hand and holding it out as well as commentary by my partner of "Well, they're family now...we have to decide how much to let them into our lives,".

Intense - no real reading or listening to any books or anything of substance before bed. Very curious where this came from.

I do remember looking up at the moon at about 4:15am seeing it 3/4 elipsed and having a quiet, private, reflective moment in the chilled air before going inside and up to bed - acknowledging the eclipse, the full moon, retrograde and the "dancing" of Winter and Summer at the Solstice. So to speak.

Ah, the human mind.

Writer's Block: Eye for an eye?
drwho laidback
bkdelong
If you bumped into someone who regularly picked on you as a child, what would you say to them?


Times change, people change. I'd ask some careful, polite questions of how they are and how their life is going and most likely let them know in my responses that the past is the past. THEY may recall the bullying and either feel remorseful or still antagonistic about it.
Depending on their approach will color the tone of my speech but not the general language - we've both grown up, I've moved onto other things and am better for it.

Writer's Block: Unplugged
2014
bkdelong
For how much money would you be willing to spend a whole week away from the Internet, TV, and mobile phones? Would you suffer withdrawal pains?


I'd definitely suffer a degree of withdrawal. Plus I sit in front of a computer all day working on it so while I could take a week's vacation, I wouldn't necessarily want to do so without some access to Net or a mobile for looking up dinner places, dinner plans etc. So I'd probably want to be compensated for a week worth of work pay.

Writer's Block: Passing the time
2014
bkdelong
What's your favorite thing to do on long car rides?


Listen to either NPR or a Book on CD. Depending on my interest with either and the amount of traffic, I construct a series of waypoints in my head and sort of watch the field of cars before me with an imaginary "Heads-Up Display". Then I end up calculating which lane I should be in to avoid slowing down, getting stuck behind someone slower than I am, or to get moving faster than I am presently.

I have always had a very nonlinear way of dealing with math and logic but having the background "noise" to focus the language center of my brain seems to kick-in the inateness of the logic portion. I don't "think" about it, I just "see" the various permutations based on drivers' speed, movements back and forth (if they're doing their own lane switching) and their own relationships with the cars around them. It's fascinating and fun though easier to do by myself and far moreseo sans kids.

[UMass Band] Stories from Jim Reid - '86 Harvard & '90 Villanova Football Games
gnp
bkdelong
I was reading up on the various remembrance of George Parks on Facebook and came across one of the infamous 1986 Harvard game when the band "charged" the field after they were told they'd get arrested if they'd play during halftime. Some said they saw the first-year football coach at the time, Jim Reid (later coach of the Miami Dolphins, now current Associate Coach & Defensive Coordinator for the University of Virginia Cavaliers) seem a bit dejected prior to the incident and then use the band's chutzpah to encourage the team to go out and kick some butt.

Being the people-finding researcher I am, I reached out to Jim, asked if he heard of Mr. Parks' passing and wondered if he'd share his side of the story while we were all in a reminiscing frame of mind.

So here it is, from former UMass football Coach Jim Reid in his own words:

First, the story of the UMass vs Harvard game, November 8, 1986 in Cambridge, MA -

"George was angry that the police wouldn't let him on the field. I think my exact quote was:

'F**k them George! Run right through them!'

I really didn't think that he would do it but he did. Then I did, in fact, tell our team that the band just ran right over the police and if they tried to arrest George (and the band) we would all fight them. They were all fired up; we went out and kicked their butts. "

(Editor's Note: UMass won 17-7. This story is also told by various people on Pgs. 156-157 of "Through These Doors: The History of the UMMB, 1863 - 2003" by Kerstin Becker)

---

"But a better story (which I have not told to many people) occurred during the 1990 season.

November, 10, 1990: It was raining heavily during the Villanova game - in fact it had rained heavily all Friday night. We were leading 3-0 at the half. If we won that game we would be Yankee Conference Champions.

As I walked out of the stadium at half-time I saw George. He was angry so I asked him what was wrong. He told me that the administration wouldn't let him on the field.

I said, "Of course not, George, that field would turn into a quagmire if you guys got on it."

I thought about it for a minute then ran back to him and said 'Get that damn band out there and march around as long as you can.'

Honestly, I was shocked when I came back on the field. It was 10" of mud. Nobody scored in the second half and we won the Championship. George and the famous UMass Marching Band was the key factor. Of course, I denied to everyone anyone that I ever told George to take the band on the field.

I have told Andy Talley, Head Coach of Villanova for 20 years, I had nothing to do with the UMass Band going on the field. He may find out now [but considering the circumstances], I think that will be OK.

I loved both those men - both George Parks and Gerry Grady [NB: Grady passed on 9/2/2010]. Both great, great, great men!!!"

(Editor's Note: The New York Times covers that game very briefly here:


Hofstra Will Face Cortland State
by William N Wallace
November 12, 1990

...

UMass in Playoffs

...

The East has another playoff team in Massachusetts, the Yankee Conference champion, but the outlook for bowl-game invitations dimmed for Syracuse, which lost to Tulane on Saturday, and Army, defeated by Air Force. Penn State, which next plays Notre Dame, is the only viable Eastern bowl candidate.

...


UMass, a 3-0 victor over Villanova in the mud at Amherst, clinched the Yankee Conference title for the third time in five years and became the first outright champion since 1985 even with one game left, against New Hampshire.

The Minutemen thus gained the automatic bid for the 16-team Division I-AA tournament, which begins Nov. 24. This team, which survived the loss of its quarterback, Gary Wilkos -- injured in the sixth game -- has an 8-0-1 record, the tie coming against Holy Cross in the opening game, Sept. 8.)

[UMass Band] Order the Big Ten Network for today on Comcast for ~$4.26
2014
bkdelong
(ETA 12:06 pm No Pre-Game Tribute or mention of Parks or the band yet. Disappointing.)

Just called Comcast to see what it would take to get the Big Ten Network for the day for today's UMass vs UMich game. They are supposed to have a tribute to UMass Band Director George N Parks in the wake of his sudden passing, a live shot of the band and a moment of silence. I'm hoping there may even be some half-time coverage since they ended up continuing out for the game.

In Salem, MA it's part of their Sports & Entertainment package which costs $7.95/mo.

It costs $1.99 to add to the account. It costs $1.99 to take off the account.

When you remove it, it's prorated to how long you had it for the month. $7.95/30 days is ~$0.26 per day.

So to get the game for the day provided YOU CANCEL THE PACKAGE AFTER THE GAME should be about $4.26.

I am Tivoing it and adding 10min before and 1hr after it.

Comcast customer support is 1-800-266-2278

Here's additional info on where it's being broadcast.

[Job Opp] Freelance PHP/MySQL/AJAX Programmer & Architect to Create Social networking site
2014
bkdelong
Social Networking startup looking for freelance PHP, MySQL, & AJAX coder that's fast, reliable, and currently available to work on a unique project to architect a system where people can share "short stories" within the site's community and/or with a select group of "Friends" or contacts that they follow in the site's network.

Each "story" would be open to "reviews" and contributing to a set of statistics based on words that appear in the stories on the site. Ability to link user accounts with Facebook IDs through Facebook Connect or the Facebook API is key.

This would be a two-phase project ideally lasting no longer than 2 months. Phase One would net result in a $2000-$3000 payout depending on experience or arrangement made prior to work commencing. (The more fast and proficient the coder, the higher the rate of pay for the less time it takes to complete required tasks and milestones.)

This project can guarantee a degree of fun and prestige, despite the vagueness in description, the founders (coming from acclaimed Harry Potter fansites "MuggleNet and "The Leaky Cauldron") are assured that the idea in its entirety is presently unique. They're looking for someone to help get it off the ground and, ideally, an architect who would stay on an as-needed, contractual basis to keep it running as necessary.

Contact john@essentialhype.com with a resume, portfolio or examples of previous work and references. If lacking any of those, email what you've got and they'll make a decision based on that.

Missing Teen: Have You Seen Morgan?
pooh-cloud
bkdelong
Originally posted by shadesong at Have You Seen Morgan?


[info]bifemmefatale's 16-year-old daughter ran away. Her mother says: "Friends say she hopped a Megabus to the Carbondale, IL area to attend the upcoming Rainbow Gathering Oct. 1. She may change her destination if she knows she is being looked for. She's supposedly traveling with 2 guys named Tim and Josh, both Caucasian, early 20s or late teens, one with a "cholo tear" tattoo near his eye. She's 5'5", 120#, reddish-blonde hair, long bangs and sidelocks, short in back, always wears her jean vest with studs and patches on it. She may be begging for spare change. If you see her, *please* contact me and the police! 16 is too young to be running around the country on her own. I'm very worried for her safety. Thanks in advance."

Click here for original post and additional picture, and to let her know if you see Morgan!